Florida Life // Year One

February 1, 2019 by Hillary Leave a Comment

I’m sitting on the couch on the last day of January, reflecting on the past 365 days. I know what you’re probably thinking… wasn’t I supposed to do that last month before 2019 began?

Well, today, February 1, marks one year since I hopped on a plane with a one-way ticket to Florida. So, in my eyes, my “New Year” starts today.

Never in one million years did I think I would reside in Florida… but, at the tailend of 2017, life swiftly directed me east (with an epic, spontaneous cross-country road trip!). Never in one million years did I think the military would be a part of my life either, but it has been a significant aspect of my life since fall of 2015. Oh, Life, you always give us exactly what we need.

After moving across the country – literally from one opposite corner to the other – I shared monthly recaps of this new chapter of “Florida Life”. You can find those here:

Florida Life // Months 7 & 8

Florida Life // 6 Months In

Florida Life // Months 4 & 5

Florida Life // Month 2

Florida Life // Month 1

But the recaps of Month 9, 10, 11, and 12 never made an appearance in due time… so here we are, officially one year later. Transitions are hard. You probably know that. We all go through transitions, all of the time. Some are more significant than others. After much of the newness wore off, I didn’t feel as inspired to share… to be vulnerable, frankly. To share while I was in the thick of my personal transition. And while I’ve been in the Southeast a for a full trip around the sun, I am still navigating through this transition.

If I am being honest, “Florida Life” has been an extremely challenging chapter, for both me and Nick. But, with any chapter, we know this is only temporary and it, too, will come to a close; so, we do our best to keep our chins up and be grateful for the experience… even if it is tough a lot of the time.

I’ll be blunt and say that I do not like living in Florida. If you couldn’t guess, it is drastically different than Northern California. City living isn’t for us (we’re in the busy, traffic-y Tampa Bay area), and that’s okay. One, of the many, things I’ve learned this year is that it is good to learn what you don’t like, and what you don’t want, because it helps to clarify what you do.

Rather than share the highlights of Year 1, I’d rather share thoughts, reflections, and lessons learned. Because, let’s be real, I, too, can be guilty of falling into the trap of using social media (and my blog) as a highlight reel.

Florida Life // Year 1: Thoughts, Reflections & Lessons Learned

1. Despite being 3,000+ miles away from my hometown, family, friends, my Chico community, my safe place(s)… my anxiety has been at a record low.

2. Officially becoming a #dogmom was one of the best things about this year. Koba helped me through the humps and hard days more than she will ever know.

3. Anything with repetition gets a bit easier, time after time. Including driving in horrific traffic on the daily.

4. Living in a sea of box stores, toll roads and bumper to bumper freeways makes me appreciate my rural, humble, Humboldt roots.

5. I am not a huge fan of talking on the phone, but long conversations with my girlfriends are everything to me now.

6. I may have overreacted by hiding in the bathtub with that tornado warning.

7. When you’re navigating through a challenging time, add things to your calendar that bring you joy: trips, self care, date nights. The little things are the big things.

8. Your environment has a huge impact on your overall happiness and wellbeing. If you are able, chose to reside in a place that meshes with your values.

9. This move has instilled in me the confidence to move to new places. But, overall, my confidence has seen better days.

10. Nick and I are polar opposites. There is no way we could have survived this year without each other. #gratefulAF

Florida Life // Year 1 #tampa #florida #lifeinmytwenties

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This past year I got real comfortable being uncomfortable, endured hurricane season and hellishly-humid weather, gave my best attempt at being a dog mom to the sweetest puppy, got a non-wellness related job, started a new business, switched up my exercise routine, tested my strength at Orangetheory, expanded my tribe of like-minded, driven women, avoided any alligator sightings, cherished a culturally-diverse Thanksgiving, improved my military vocabulary, laughed a lot, and became a lot more in tune with who I am at my core, and how I want to cultivate a life I love.

I don’t have a magic eight ball to know when and where we’re headed next, so you can follow along on Instagram as we explore Florida livin’ until the adventure continues!

Florida Life // Months 7 & 8

October 1, 2018 by Hillary 4 Comments

I’ve lived in Florida for a little over eight months – time flies! Before we know it, a year will have flown by. But I’m kinda sorta okay with that. I never want to rush through life, but after eight months, Nick and I have established that Florida Life isn’t for us. We still have a bit more time here in the Southeast, but, fingers crossed, we will be packing up our belongings by the two year mark. We’ll see! #militarylife

So, let’s catch up on the last two months in Florida (a.k.a. August and September)…

Labor Day 2018 at Honeymoon Island State Park before we got rained out!

Florida Life // Months 7 & 8

Doing

I’d say the biggest adjustment the past couple of months has been getting back into the groove of working again. I started a part-time job in Human Resources at the end of July, so now my week days start with early alarms and a dreaded commute.

Outside of working 30 hours a week, much of August and September was spent acclimating to the hellishly humid and wet dog days of summer. I feel like weather in Florida is backwards. Anyone else feel me? Summer was VERY rainy! We could expect an afternoon thunderstorm almost daily. Both Nick and I have never experienced thunder and lightning like that in Tampa Bay.

Most every weekend, between dodging said storms, we explore new gator-free places for Koba to swim. She’s a water dog at heart and unfortunately has spent far too much time indoors due to the heat and humidity.

Speaking of Koba, I think I think the highlight of my summer (and hopefully her’s too!) was that a brand new dog park opened just a few blocks from our during house Labor Day Weekend. I don’t know who enjoys trips to the park more, me or Koba, but I am so appreciative that we now have a place for our puppy to play and socialize, and it’s just a sweaty, 15-minute walk away.

August was also an exciting month for my Beautycounter business, accomplishing goals while getting more in tune with my why behind this business and how it supports my dreams. Heads up: Beautycounter’s holiday line launches this Thursday! Hello, new products and incredible gift sets for everyone on your list (hey, it’s never too early to start your holiday shopping).

My simple Beautycounter makeup routine for early weekday mornings.

Feeling

With a regular work schedule and regularly scheduled workouts, a sense of routine is helping me to feel more settled. I still long for the ease and comfort of Chico more often than not – sometimes it’s for my favorite coffee shop and running trails, other times it’s for happy hours with girlfriends, my healthcare practitioners, and the proximity to the family. I definitely miss the sense of community. On the other hand, I feel proud of my ability to adapt. And honestly, sometimes I surprise myself with how well I’m doing despite not having my support circle anywhere near. A small town girl for 28 years adapting to city living involves a lot of change, and I’m doing my best to embrace it.

Activities & Adventures

We didn’t venture far from the Tampa Bay area this summer due to said new job and, well, our spring was full of travel. We did enjoy a free Brett Young concert with friends on a random Wednesday night at Armature Works, our favorite hangout spot.

Koba and I post Orangetheory sweat sesh, September 2018.

Exercise

Orangetheory, 100%. I jumped on board the OTF train at the end of July (read: My Thoughts on Orangetheory Fitness), and I’m really enjoying it! I think it was just the thing I needed to get through the peak of summer, as exercising outside is nearly impossible due to the weather. I go to four classes per week, on average, and haven’t been doing much else aside from that and walking the dog. I am looking forward to start running outside again as the temperature continues to drop.

Hurricanes

Zero! Not holding my breath, as hurricane season isn’t over. Well, Hurricane Michael is sweeping through at this very moment, but – knock on wood – we’ll remain out of his path.

Alligators

Zero!

Thank you to those of you who have stuck around through my lulls of blogging. This November will mark nine years since the birth of Nutrition Nut on the Run, and it’s captured varying seasons of my life for almost a decade. I look forward to continue sharing on this platform from time to time, though posting consistently hasn’t been my strong point of late. I hope you will stick around – it’s a joy to have you here!

xx Hill

Florida Life

Florida Life // 6 Months In

July 29, 2018 by Hillary 5 Comments

It’s a stormy, summer Sunday afternoon and we’re doing the epitome of chillaxin’ after a fun weekend with friends. It seems like just the right setting to write about my sixth month living in Florida. On one hand, it’s hard to believe that I’ve lived here half of a year. On the other hand, sometimes it feels like we moved ages ago… but that may be the homesickness of having friends and family miles and miles away.

Since it’s been a lazy day fueled by strong coffee, I figured I’d switch up the format of my monthly recap and do a virtual coffee date of sorts.

If we were having coffee today, I’d tell you that I got a non-wellness related job in Human Resources. In the last recap I said that I was itching to work; well, something finally fell into place (many job applications later). I’m glad that it is only part-time for now in order to adjust to a structured work schedule again. I am hoping to spend the hours that aren’t in my new office working on the blog, getting my health coaching services up and running again, and sharing safer skincare via Beautycounter.

If we were having coffee today, I’d tell you that I joined a gym — yahoo! This was a fairly hefty piece that’s been missing since moving cross-country. I’ve kept my body in motion the past sixth months with a mixture of running/walking, home workouts, and the occasional gym session, but I’m totally pumped to have a “gym” just a couple of miles from home that will push me out of my workout comfort zone. I say “gym” because Orangetheory Fitness is a boutique fitness studio. Essentially you show up and get coached through a 60-minute interval workout in a group setting. While I’m no rookie to HIIT or interval training, I’ve never paid for this type of membership. I’m going to give it a shot for a month or two, and see how I like it. My mind is so much clearer when I have consistent exercise in my routine, and I think the endorphin highs will be a beneficial mood booster.

If we were having coffee today, I’d tell you that I’m working with my naturopath again. I am hoping to get some answers on what’s going on with my gut (do I still have SIBO?) and possible hormonal imbalances. The brain-gut connection is so real, and so I’ve asked for help to continue healing my gut which, in turn, should help ease other various symptoms (i.e. skin and mood).

If we were having coffee today, I’d tell you that last weekend Nick and I ran the Tampa Bay 8K hosted by Lululemon. It was just a “fun run”, but the first organized run I’ve done a while. Running in the humidity is not for sissies. I started out way too fast and lost all steam by the end. We both finished at the top of the pack surprisingly, and enjoyed participating in a free community event with other local runners. All around it was a win-win.

If we were having coffee today, I’d tell you that I wasn’t aware of how wet Florida summers are until living in it. Being a California-native where the weather is often ideal, I’m not used to stormy weather in the middle of summer when I imagine spending my days outdoors in nature. Needless to say, I am eager for fall/winter when we don’t have to worry about lightning, flooding, intense humidity, and the grass won’t grow inches overnight.

If we were having coffee today, I’d tell you that I miss the ease of familiarity. As expected I suppose, almost everything in the past six months has been NEW: new house, new city, new roads, new friends, new job, new gym, new dentist, new grocery store, new coworkers, new climate, new culture. It requires a lot of mental energy that can be exhausting at times. But the best things don’t come from staying in your comfort zone. Isn’t that how the saying goes?

I am hoping that I’ll start to feel a little more like myself again (oh how I thrive off consistency and routine!) with a set work schedule, scheduled workouts, and the consistent support from my naturopath.

I survived the first six months of #floridalife… now I’m ready to thrive!

Thanks for reading,

xx Hill

Florida Life

Month 1: settling in.

Month 2: exploring our surroundings.

Month 3: fun with friends & family.

Months 4 & 5: figuring out my purpose here + California travels.

Have you done an Orangetheory Fitness workout?

What do you have planned for the remainder of your summer?

On Slowing Down

July 20, 2018 by Hillary 6 Comments

It’s Friday morning.

I’m sipping my black half-caff collagen coffee and glass of freshly-squeezed lemon water.

The house is dark aside from the dreary light shining through the cracked blinds.

The rain comes and it goes. This is summer in Florida, I suppose.

My sweet puppy is snoozing at my feet.

And I’m finally getting around to writing on the blog this week.

You see, I’ve recently created some loose goals regarding creating new content here and across my social channels.

Last week, I was in a grove. And this week… well, it has been a different pace, slower most certainly.

Most mornings have been slow moving. Just like today.

Workouts and exercise has been regular yet relaxed. Gentle yoga made a comeback!

Sometimes our bodies and our minds need to take the steam off in this pressure-cooker pace of life.

Society tells us we need to be on our game around the clock, never missing a beat.

Yet, when we pause and reflect, and turn off – even momentarily – our inspiration and our drive has a chance to refuel in order to give, produce, teach, guide, nurture…

My hope is that you can appreciate the moments or days or weeks when life moves at a slower pace, when you feel a tad less inspired, or motivated, or even lost.

Those moments, if we let them, teach us something too.

Enjoy the ebb and the flow.

xx Hill

On Slowing Down #iamwellandgood #trusttheprocess

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Florida Life // Months 4 & 5

July 3, 2018 by Hillary Leave a Comment

Hi & Happy JULY! I still can’t believe we’re over halfway through 2018, and I also can’t believe that I am entering my sixth month living in Florida. Time travels too darn fast.

I missed getting my Month 4 recap up on the blog in due time, so I’m clumping together months 4 and 5. Essentially, I am going to try to summarize May and June, but that could turn into 4,000 words if didn’t refrain myself… so I’ll give ya the gist of it. Luckily, being to the point is one of my specialties 😉

Month 1: settling in.

Month 2: exploring our surroundings.

Month 3: fun with friends & family.

Months 4 & 5: figuring out my purpose here + California travels.

Florida Life // Months 4 & 5

When I think to May & June, I think California. Nick and I traveled back to California twice in the span of a few weeks for two weddings. Those trips filled me up more than I knew they would. Spending time with friends and family, visiting our old stomping grounds and sacred spots in Chico, and cruising around NorCal as if it were still home… we both needed those long weekends in California. I wish we could do them all over again.

Adjusting to life in Florida remains a challenge, emotionally speaking. Find my purpose here, in this new chapter, remains challenging. Being thousands of miles away from friends and family is challenging. But what’s not challenging: living with Nick and Koba in our rental house (with oh so many functional flaws) surround by lush vegetation, and exploring an entirely new city in a vastly different part of the United States. One day, I know I’ll look back on this temporary time here with appreciation that I grabbed life by the horns and accepted this adventure. I want to embrace this place and period of life for all that is has to offer, while holding on to my dreams of living in a community that suits my lifestyle, beliefs, and wellbeing.

Feeling //

I am feeling like I am desperately ready to work work work. Ideally I’d like to work part-time (not from home) to allow me to focus on Beautycounter.

I am feeling like I am trying to find my purpose in this new phase of life. It is crazy how we so often define ourselves by the work we do. I am trying to free myself of that mindset while simultaneously finding work that fills me up.

Missing //

– dry summer heat vs. humid summer heat

– the Chico farmer’s markets, shopping locally, eating local produce

– spending time at the lake/river, not having to worry about gators and critters

– small town vibes

Doing //

I almost deleted this category, as it suggests to me that I need to fill it in with all of the things. But that isn’t what feels good in this moment. Nick and I have had significant dialogue lately about letting what is be enough. Perhaps I’ll pick up with the “doings” next month; but for now, I am going to keep the focus on all that I did do and accomplish in these past two months, rather than what I did not.

“Everyone you meet always asks if you have a career, are married or own a house as if life was some kind of grocery list. But no one ever asks you if you are happy.” — Heath Ledger

Activities & Adventures //

The highlights are unquestionably our trips to California. They were filled with pure goodness from start to finish. We also visited new friends in Orlando for a fun weekend in the middle of June, and I rang in my 29th year with a massage, takeout sushi, and by blowing out candles in tub of coffee chocolate chip Talenti.

California Dreamin’ — CA Trip #1 | May 2018
This is 29!

Exercise //

I certainly do not feel like I am at my fittest. This probably has something to do with the fact that I don’t have a gym membership. I get to the gym on base on average once per week, and the rest of my movement consists of home workouts and cardio (whether it be run, jog, or walk) around the neighborhood with Koba. It’s near impossible to exercise outside during the summer here, or it has to be timed precisely. Nick and I tried a class at Orangetheory Fitness, and while we both had a blast and were quite sore the following 48 hours, we are still tossing around the idea of a membership.

Eats & Restaurants //

There’s no chance I can recap two months of eats and restaurant outings, but a highlight was definitely my belated birthday dinner at Steelbach. I mean, just look at that beet salad with citrus, fresh mint, hazelnuts — sold instantly. I’ve been enjoying homemade colds salads – per the seasonal change in weather – but otherwise, still munching on much of the same.

Alligators //

None!

Let’s do this, Month 6… may you be full of inspiration and gratitude — for what is!

xx Hill

Say hi! I’d love to hear from you — leave a comment below.

Florida Life // Month 3

May 7, 2018 by Hillary 2 Comments

Hi! I am a little late to the game posting my monthly recap of life in Florida (insert my excuse), but late or not, here we are.

It’s been a little over three months since I moved to the Tampa Bay area, but most days it feels like much longer ago. I don’t know if there is such a thing as homesick fever, but if there is, I have it.

Month 1: settling in.

Month 2: exploring our surroundings.

Month 3: fun with friends & family.

Florida Life // Month 3

Feeling // Homesick, plain and simple. I try not to think about the fact that I’m more than 3,000 miles away from most of my friends and family. I anticipate this feeling will dissipate as I get into a regular routine, but chatting on the phone or FaceTime is not the same as going for a run or sipping cocktails with a girlfriend. I am also feeling antsy to work. The job hunt continues…

Missing // If it wasn’t clear from above — my people. I also miss Chico a lot. While I was born and raised in Humboldt County, Chico feels home-y to me. I miss small-town life, and the mountains. But… in less than two weeks, we are headed back to Cali! We will be in NorCal twice in the span of three weeks for a couple of weddings. While I am excited about both trips, I am bit apprehensive that I won’t want to return to life in the South.

Doing // April, or Month 3 (as they are one in the same), was a busy month for us! Between Nick’s surprise birthday weekend (his two best friends flew out from CA for a few days) and my dad visiting for a week at the end of the month, the month was packed with fun activities ↓ ↓

I also worked – behind the scenes – with a graphic designer to give Nutrition Nut on the Run an anticipated mini makeover. Unfortunately, after six weeks in the making, it did not turn out as I’d envisioned. So, here we are, back to drawing board; meanwhile, I am embracing the current layout and functionality of the blog until the timing is right to try again.

Nick & his besties playing frisbee at St. Pete Beach

Activities & Adventures // Of course the highlights of the month were completely surprising Nick for his birthday by having his friends stay with us for a weekend and my Dad spoiling us with good eats and house tweaks for a week. I feel like we explored quite a bit of the bay area this month with highlights including finally going to the beach (St. Pete Beach) and sticking my toes in the warm Gulf water, getting a fresh cut at Level Salon Spa, visiting The Florida Aquarium on a stormy Sunday, and soaking up the sun and chill vibes at Armature Works.

Florida Life // Month 3 #floridalife

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Exercise // Oh, exercise. It definitely seemed like there were a significant amount of rest days in April. That’s intuitive exercise for you. I still have yet to sign up for a gym membership, so exercise is a mix of walks with the dog, the occasional run (I haven’t been enjoying it as much), backyard workouts at home, and gym workouts on base. I did try out a few classes at CAMP Tampa this past month, and had an absolute blast; so, if I do get a membership somewhere, this is definitely a top contender.

Eats // Although we ate out a bunch, we enjoyed many healthy, wholesome meals at home. The highlight was definitely when Dad came with his sourdough supplies in tow (read: he dried his sourdough starter and packed it in his suitcase — that’s dedication!) and, together, we baked up two beautiful loaves of homemade bread. Dad’s poached eggs on homemade sourdough. Enough said.

I often share food highlights on Instagram. So get yourself on over there for the action.

Restaurants // We ate ate out quite a bit in April, but such is life considering we had visitors. And when you have out of town guests, it is only reasonable that you explore the local eats. I wish I had kept track of everywhere we did dine, but the Cliffs Notes version is: sushi in Ybor City at Samurai Blue, rainy day happy hour drinks at Fly, post-beach fare at The Avenue (St. Pete), Boca Tampa with Dad, sunny Saturday cocktails enjoyed al fresco at Armature Works (such a fun vibe, we’ll be back!), plus a Don’t Kale My Vibe smoothie from Sweet Soul.

Boca Tampa

Alligators // Zero… aside from seeing them at the aquarium.

That was Month 3 of Florida Life in a nutshell. While moving across the country from everything you know is not easy, I am happy I am here.

xx Hill

What were your April highlights?

Have you ever moved far far way from home?

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Florida Life // Month 2

April 1, 2018 by Hillary 2 Comments

It’s not hard to believe that it has been two whole months since moving across the country. Thinking back to when our house was lined high with cardboard boxes somehow feels like a far away memory. Perhaps this is a sign that I am feeling more at home in my new southern environment. If Month 1 was all about settling in, the chapter of Month 2 would be titled: Exploring Our Surroundings.

Florida Life // Month 2

Feeling // Self-love was a struggle this month. I’m adamant about making positive self-talk a priority as I continue to adjust to this new season of life, figuratively (and literally), in Florida; part two of Loving Myself Through A New Season of Life is planned to appear on the blog here soon. Overall, I am feeling rather comfortable. I adore being a dog mom, and I may be a tad obsessed with my puppy. #newmom

Missing // Family and friends, period… but luckily we have some special guests visiting this month!

Doing // I began a new venture with Beautycounter this past month (this season of new beginnings is endless, no?). I shared why I decided to join the Beautycounter movement (along with my personal skin story), in case you missed the detailed version. In short, I am excited about this fresh opportunity to educate others about safer skin care, and to get safer products into the hands of everyone (Beautycounter or not). Needles to say, this new gig has taken much of my attention the past few weeks, and I’m not mad about it.

Enjoying // Learning a new job, a.k.a. the business that is Beautycounter.

Exercise // Exercise looks nearly identical to Month 1. I have a feeling that the almost daily dog walk and runs will look a little different starting this month or next as the humidity and heat start to turn for the worse. We did try out one crossfit-esque gym, and while it was conveniently located near our house, we were unimpressed with the coaching. We have plans to try out a true crossfit gym this week… but home workouts are doing a fair job for now.

Eats // While we certainly ate out more this month than the first (see below), I am nonetheless enjoying cooking for two. The best part is eating said homemade meals outside on the back deck. All we need now is a barbecue. Our go-to neighborhood market is a brand new Sprouts that opened its doors at the end of February; I don’t know what I’d do without it.

Restaurants // First, I forgot to mention in the Month 1 recap that we stumbled upon The Hyppo in Hyde Park Village; the coconut popsicle hit the spot on a warm day. We found a local Mexican food joint, Romi’s Tacos, that does the job when we’re craving tacos and guac and/or don’t feel like cooking. But… the cream of the crop for tacos is by far Bartaco (Tampa). After our first visit, we declared it our new go-to chips and guac (and cocktails!) spot. Our second visit was on St. Patrick’s Day where we enjoyed matcha margaritas. Not only is the food on point, but the atmosphere is totally fun! We tried Boca in Brandon once more, and while the atmosphere is lovely, we decided that the Tampa location has significantly better food, and is worth the drive when we want a really nice meal. I hardly ever go to coffee shops for speciality drinks these days, but we tried Buddy Brew Coffee this past weekend for iced lattes — two thumbs up from us. And, lastly, we enjoyed some fish tacos at the Saturday Morning Market in St. Petersburg. I guess you could call us taco fiends.

Florida Life // Month 2 #floridalife

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Adventures // Feeling more settled in our new abode left more time to get out ‘n’ about the neighborhood and explore! Nick and both crave the outdoors, so we are quite happy that we found a couple of nature gems in our neck of the woods. We went to Lithia Springs Regional Park for a couple of trail walks with Koba; the trails are her happy place, too! We also went to Alafia River State Park for a very brief outing one afternoon. We will be back for more adventuring, no doubt!

Y’all probably know that I deemed the Chico Certified Farmer’s Market my church. Well, I have yet to find my replacement “church” in Florida. This past weekend, we drove across the bay to St. Pete to check out the seasonal market. We scored some loot (superfood sourdough, lavender mojito kombucha, fresh strawberries, jalapeño jam, and more), and enjoyed live music and the local vibes of St. Pete (supposedly it’s as close to Cali as we’ll get). However, I am still on the hunt for a market closer to home that can serve as my weekend church ritual.

Alligators // Zero.

What were you up to this past month?

Favorite March eats and/or adventures?

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Florida Life // Month 1

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Loving Myself Through A New Chapter of Life

March 22, 2018 by Hillary 2 Comments

In case you missed it, I recently shared my personal skin story and why I joined the Beautycounter movement of supporting, educating, and advocating for safer skin care.

If you place a Beautycounter order by Monday, 3/26, you’ll be entered to a win a Charcoal Cleansing Bar — my nightly go-to for removing makeup and feeling squeaky clean!

The inspiration that was rampant to work in this space last week took a nose dive the past few days. I couldn’t find it. I tried, but the last thing I want to do is force uninspired content in order to press publish. My bottom line is that if I am not honestly inspired by my own work, how could it inspire you?

Which leads me into a bigger conversation of self-love and self-compassion. My boyfriend graciously listens to me externally process this topic often, and the other night, he said something that stuck with me: “When you truly love and appreciate yourself for who you are, it will allow more things and opportunities to open up in your life.”

In complete transparency, adjusting to this new life in Florida has gone better than I expected. I anticipated feeling isolated in a new house, in a new town… which would, in turn, be a catalyst for my anxiety and uncomfortable panic attacks. I am so so grateful that this has not been the scenario. What I did not anticipate, however, was for my negative self-talk and self-criticism to escalate. This is something that I have struggled with for years… we’re talking since middle school when my battle with perfectionism ate away at my adolescent life.

If I hadn’t been absorbed by all the logistics of moving across the country, perhaps I could have predicted that making multiple 180 degree turns in almost all areas of my life might, just might, irritate my persistent self-critical thoughts into a dusty mess.

In this world of 24/7 social media, the comparison trap is more prevalent than ever. In my chosen circle of the healthy living and wellness realm, I can get sucked into a downward spiral of comparing myself to how others are living their healthiest life. And that’s the thing — everyone’s healthy is theirs and only theirs. It’s entirely individualistic. My body is not going to feel the same, look the same, or operate the same eating the same kale smoothie and avocado brownie that yours is.

For some reason – the reason more than likely stemming from my experience with a life-threatening illness at 7 years young – the majority of my perfectionistic thoughts and actions relate to my body… striving to control it, in any and every way possible… for nearly two whole decades. The unconscious thoughts that have been uncovered in recent years (hi, therapy!), stem from the belief that my body needed intense medical care for 19 days to stay alive so I better do everything I can each and every day to control it from being in that situation again.

Before I go too far down the rabbit hole of my battle with body image and control, let me bring us back to the present and how it is disturbing my life now — in this new chapter in Florida.

As I mentioned, many facets of my life look much different from just a couple of months ago:

Living in California >> living in Florida

Living on my own >> living with my boyfriend

Working a full-time corporate job in an office setting >> working on this space and myself — in the comfort of my home

Consistently working out at a gym on my own time >> squeezing in short runs and gym workouts that fit Nick’s schedule

Rather than giving myself any grace or wiggle room to navigate this new chapter (okay, maybe I did for a couple of weeks), I’ve continually been beating myself up about not doing enough, accomplishing enough, or contributing enough.

I know that a lot of this is rooted in recent years of supporting myself comfortably, accomplishing work Monday through Friday that equated to a regular paycheck. I did the work, unexcitably so, and reaped many benefits. Now, the passion and excitement about what I am doing is visible, but the returns on my (time) investment are not yet tangible. My boyfriend repeatedly reminds me how he has never seen me this animated about my “work.” Why can’t this be enough? Why do I have to reprimand myself for dressing in athleisure clothing Monday through Sunday and baking up batch after batch of the best paleo chocolate chunk cookies?

I wholeheartedly believe the idea that “you are right where you are supposed to be.” I am meant to be living in Florida sans an 8 to 5 job that provides a paycheck but doesn’t fill me up. Last night in bed, as my mind was churning, I came to the consensus that I am supposed to be experiencing this season of extreme solitude. It is life’s not so subtle nudge for me to work on the relationship I have with my body — with myself. This is my current 8 to 5 job. Because the relationship I have with myself directly correlates to the relationship I have with others. Because the relationship I have with myself directly correlates to my overall perspective on this messy and beautiful life. Because, as my boyfriend gently reminds me, when I love myself, and appreciate what my body has done for me and continues to do for me every day, I will naturally welcome what I desire into my life.

Loving Myself Through A New Chapter of Life

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Can you relate?

I’d love to hear your thoughts and personal self-love stories in the comments.

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Florida Life // Month 1

March 1, 2018 by Hillary 4 Comments

One month ago on Thursday, February 1, I hopped on a jet plane with a one-way ticket to Florida. After driving 3,203 miles across the country from California to Florida at the end of December, I opted for a few hours of air travel – and to ship my car – instead of doing the drive all over again.

After leaving my job of almost six years at the beginning of January, I felt pulled to accept a huge adventure and join my boyfriend in Florida, the location of his new permanent change of station (he is in the Air Force). I absolutely love Chico, my home since the fall of 2009, but now I had no strings tying me there — aside from the town’s comfort, charm, and wonderful community of people who supported me.

Decision made. I was going to shock all my family and friends and move out of California, the place I’ve called home for the first 28 years of my life.

With the help of my sweet mom, I packed up my apartment of the past five years, and said farewell to Chico (for now!) — the place I spent the majority of my twenties (from 20 to 28). Cue all the feelings.

And just like that, two quick flights later, I landed in Tampa, Florida (inappropriately dressed in winter attire) with trust in my heart… trust that this cross-country move, this adventure, was exactly what I was supposed to be experiencing.

The first month in Florida (I live in the Tampa Bay area, east of the city) can be summed up simply: settling in. Unpacking endless boxes from two separate apartments into one three-bedroom house, putting together new furniture, selling old furniture, attending to maintenance issues, calling the locksmith when you lock yourself out of the house, finding the best Target and grocery stores (well, of course!), cautiously driving on the congested roads, and using Google Maps to get everywhere.

Florida Life // Month 1

Feeling // While I have experienced moments of homesickness, I have, overall, felt proud of my adaptability this first month. A lot of time has been spent alone (while N is at work) in a new town, and in a new home. Rewind to 2016 and I surely wouldn’t have handled such solitude in a foreign place with this much ease. Koba has been an immense comfort to me, and I feel that the risks I took in 2017 have given me the strength, and trust in myself, to be okay 3,000 miles away from all I’ve ever known.

Missing // I am missing winter weather, winter clothing (my puffies and scarves), the Saturday morning farmer’s market, the convenience of running or hiking in beautiful Bidwell Park, and locally-owned stores (family & friends goes unsaid).

Doing // Simply put, most days include time spent fixing up the house, cooking in my new kitchen, and rekindling my love for this online space.

Enjoying // I am enjoying living in a house versus an apartment. It’s an older home with its functional flaws, but I am grateful to have a large backyard for the pup (with palm trees no less). I am also enjoying putting the house together, decorating new spaces, making a (temporary rental) house feel like a home. Living with a dog. This brings me so much enjoyment and comfort in a new space. I enjoy taking Koba for walks, spoiling her with peanut butter-stuffed bones, and attempting to teach her how to fetch in the backyard. One more thing… having a coffee pot! I’ve made drip coffee for years, but I’ve enjoyed the ritual of making a full pot of coffee to share every morning.

Exercise // Workouts consist of short runs (approximately 3 miles) around the neighborhood, gym workouts on base (2-3x per week), and the occasional 15-20 minute weights session in the living room.

Eats // We’ve eaten most of our meals at home. Lots of banana coconut muffins and waffles for breakfast, avocado toast combos for lunch, and dinners have included roasted chicken and taters, fish tacos with mango avocado salsa, Mediterranean quinoa bowls… oh, and I can’t forget about these cookies — they’re dangerously good!

Restaurants // We’ve hardly eaten out this past month, but we did go to Boca for dinner (the Brandon location) and Platt Street Borough Bar & Eatery (Hyde Park) for brunch. We agreed that we prefer the Boca Tampa location best, and we’ll be back to Platt Street for happy hour.

Alligators // Zero.

Florida Life // Month 1

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Have you ever moved far away?

If so, what are your tips for learning a new place and settling in?